The Grace of Lending an Ear
The Christian art of listening rather than speaking
We live in a societal age in which all people have the opportunity to share their opinions. Not only do we have abundant opportunities to share our opinions, but we abundantly LOVE doing so. In fact, opinion-sharing is what I am doing now! Though I don’t intend to burden your conscience with the notion that we shouldn’t share our opinions, a discussion is warranted. We must reflect on the great temptation in our age of opinion-sharing: neglecting our Christian duty of lending an ear. After all, the grace of lending an ear is an especially great gift in an age of loud-mouths.
Our Duty of Not Speaking
This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to
speak and slow to anger;
— James 1:19
James exhorts us to show ourselves as those who are quick to hear the thoughts of others and consequently slow to speak AND slow to anger. The first two seem like an obvious pair, but why is anger mentioned? I postulate that being quick to hear and slow to speak produces patience in us, which then mitigates anger. On the contrary, if we never listen, but rather hear only a few words before jumping to a wrong conclusion, then we are easily enticed to anger. To avoid undue anger, we need to be reasonable Christian people, who are ready to listen to a full argument rather than people who are triggered by a quick tweet.
Additionally, listening is how we LEARN about the world. If we always want to share our opinion, then we become cups constantly poured, yet never refilled. If we desire to promulgate good information from our own mouths, then we must first be eager listeners. I would argue that reading informative books applies to this category as well. We have an aversion to reading in our age of opinion-sharing because we do not like to listen. Yet if we actually take the time to read books about triggering topics, maybe we wouldn’t be as easily triggered. If we read and listen, maybe we would be equipped to refute triggering arguments because we know EXACTLY where our enemies are coming from.
Now therefore, my sons, listen to me, And pay attention to the words of my mouth.
— Proverbs 7:24
Wise men store up knowledge, But with the mouth of the foolish, ruin is at hand. —
Proverbs 10:14
The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; The one who opens wide his lips
comes to ruin. — Proverbs 13:3
Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; When he closes his lips, he
is considered prudent.— Proverbs 17:28
Ultimately, what we say we must also own. Jesus says that out of the mouth the heart speaks. The things that we confess indicate the state of our hearts. Every careless word spoken will be taken into account by our Father, and by others. The unbelieving world is watching and listening to what the ambassadors of Christ say. May we balance our speech with prudent, listening silence. People love to talk; if we quietly listen, we may hear something otherwise muffled by our own yapping. There is much grace in lending an ear, and it requires us to be disciplined in the art of listening. Mind you, listening is not just staring at a person. We must be active listeners and include subtle actions, like nodding, which communicates our interest and love. We ought to react to words spoken because we truly do consider the plights of others. This brings us to our final point to consider.
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The Highest Example of Lending an Ear
Even the King of kings himself listens. Does he not hear our prayers? Consider further, God is constantly upholding the world by the word of his power, or in other words, he is constantly speaking. Why does God constantly speak? Truly, he has something to say every moment. Even though God is the only one who really has words worth speaking, he still condescends to listen to us! This should spur us on to be great listeners and love our brothers, sisters, family, friends, and enemies. It is therapeutic and comforting to be lent an ear and one of God’s great ways of comforting us is by listening and concerning himself with our affairs.
Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.
— 1 Peter 5:6-7
We can mimic our Heavenly Father by listening to others. A Christian thoroughly listening to others in their times of need displays something that all the apologetic talking in the world never accomplishes. According to 1 Peter 5:7, one of the ways God humbles us is by listening when we cry out to him. This same interaction between two humans could have a profound, humbling effect on the one casting their cares. However, the only true comfort we can offer as we listen is that of the gospel and the comfort found in the God of all comfort. That is the difference between our listening and God’s listening. Our listening is derivative and reliant on the ultimate comfort giver.
So, next time you have an opportunity to listen, do it faithfully. Opportunities to listen can also be cultivated. We are very wary of silence in our conversations because we worry we may bore the other person. Sometimes this silence compels our conversant to open up and drive the conversation somewhere else. Let us allow for moments like this to happen. Silence isn’t the only path, sometimes a well placed, genuine, probing question can accomplish this same goal. Friends, let us learn to lend our ears to others rather than just our mouth. There is a time and a place for both.
— For The King, Rocky
Convicting. Thanks!